ONE BIG BLOG, EVERYBODY IN IT!

first and foremost: guess which HORRIBLY GOOD TV show is FILMING right outside MY OFFICE right NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW…

XOXO

 

hai hai!! Just one of the perks of working on (near) the Upper East Side!

[UPDATE: I found out later, it was actually Anne Hathaway outside my building. But I like that Chuck Bass clip, so I'm leavin it.]

My own personal hero, Lindsay Lohan, was also seen walking around my work hood yesterday and I can’t BELIEVE i missed her. I need more time off work for celebrity stalking.

Secondly: had a great time drinking in Oberlin this weekend even though I returned to New York exhausted and thoroughly sunburned. Its ok because I took Tuesday to recover; I grocery shopped (hello, bagel bites!), watched the premiere episode of “Living Lohan” at 11am on E!, and saw “Annie Hall” at Film Forum with my roommie. Great day!

But you know what I really should have lined up for? Tuesday’s New York City Premiere of “Sex and The City” at Rockafeller Center. Can’t BELEIVE I forgot to go and gawk! I completely missed my chance to lick Jason Lewis’ stomach and help. Kim. Catral. Pull. Up. Her. Dress….

What the FUCK, lady?

This is just a joke now: Kim, you have only ONE important thing to do this month and that’s to SHOW UP TO YOUR PREMIERES and LOOK GOOD! And by “look good,” I do NOT mean look like a disjointed paper doll. I am just so put off by this dress. Its horrible. I haven’t seen anything so dis-proportionate since I was 15 in Israel and my friends and I met a guy we nicknamed “DP” because his head was significantly smaller than his body.

And, as if the front wasn’t bad enough:

Something NOT FLATTERING is happening in that anal region.

Im just sad about it. Maybe a humongous Almond Hershey’s Kiss would cheer me up…you know, the Gold ones?

 

 

MMMMM, almonds.

Why Kristin Davis keeps choosing this A-Line skirt is just beyond me. It aint doin nothin for her legs. Add it to her back woods teenage beauty queen hairsprayed coif, and you dont get much. Bad, Kristin, BAD GIRL!

You know, I’m done with these women. I’m going to see the movie tomorrow night at 8pm and then I’m going to forget about them forever (not likely) because they just don’t send me flowers anymore. Let’s move on to something a bit more smiley:

TOP CHEF!

The rat-face FINALLY got the boot last night, and not a moment too soon. If he made it to the finals I would have shit twice and died. Honestly, I think him and Lisa both shoulda gotten cut. No need for either of them, really. Not when Stephanie is around, cute-in it up all over the place!

 

 Go Stephanie! Its your birthday! Shake your booty! YA!

I LOVE this girl!! And you know who else has a huge crush on her? Tom. Totally. Tom wants to do Stephanie and Padma is mad about it. (For hilarious coverage of Stephanie’s cleavage, please visit “Amuse Biatch“. Too funny).

Anywho, Lisa will go next week, then we’ll get the reunion where Miss Badger Face will pout and act all innocent while Dale and Andrew rip her a new vagina. Then We’ll have Blais vs. Antonia vs. STEPHANIE, FTW! WOO HOO! Count down to Shear Genius…

And FINALLY, MOST IMPORTANTLY: LOST TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CAN’T WAIT!

CAN’T WAIT!

CAN’T WAIT!

great day!